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What are you waiting for?

IDont think Sharing my College assignements on My Socmed is the Most sensible thing for me to do , Albeit IAm Not Particularly against my Irls Finding my Twitter . IfYou're Here Hi 👋👋👋 I'veBeen Trying to bridge the Gap between Me irl and What I Do online because (OBvy with Some decorum In Mind , And Lots of Space for my Personal life . I'm Not giving Everything away... For Free.(ImBeingCarefulAboutThis)) Despite the Societal pressure To "Keep Your Footprint Squeaky Clean" Or on the Down low I Cant really Keep lying to myself That Im Not The Person You See On The Daily when I put my phone down . Obviously Not Trying to Doxx myself either , I Just think Keeping a front up That Im Someone else for the Sake of Appealing To the people Above Is annoying . Fatiguing . I'll Conform For all the Companies begging to Humiliate me (looking4jobssux). Still , Who knows How much IStick to my words Considering We all put up fronts in Different Situations . Am IReally Lying to myself however Or are those Different presentations a part of me Also ?
IGuess thats One of the lesser themes I Was attempting to explore here . IThink Ive Always struggled to Categorize myself Into One Thing . Or Even couple . Because IAlways found myself to be really Fractured . Inconsistent . IAlways felt like There's 50 different Sides to me that I'veNever been able to put my Finger on.
And You know , I Guess that's The case for Most people , Maybe most , INever asked . We're All expected to Fit into a Specific Genre of person , And even Those who don't fit into those categories Have their own Category . To Others Maybe I'mExtremely predictable Or The 100th Version of the same person as well . That's Also okay , I'm Not thinking of myself Highly here in the slightest (I'veNever had a self esteem That wasnt Painfully low ) ImStill a massive product of my Environment And IWill continue to shift with it . But How much can Labels really work in our favor?
At Large , This Piece isn't Meant to Convince you of anything . If Anything , It's More of a parody of Myself and my relationship with Digital Anthropology . I think the Internet is Incredibly Downplayed in its Part of Shaping culture , Even Though it has become More divisive than Ever , Many are chasing to Have their own Niche . Some Have better priorities than that . My Experience with culture will Never be 100% equal to Someone elses , Considering my Time , Place and Circumstances . And Also considering ILook like a Lunatic Regularly Entertaining only myself
"Na co ty czekasz?" Is One of the many phrases that have Been Planted under my skin . IThink a lot of Kids of Polish Parents with lots of trauma Could relate to that maybe In Some way . I'veBeen incredibly sick of being Regularly Ravaged by others , Yelled at , Taken Advantage of . And I Let it happen Way too much With zero Resistance . Not Much forgiveness -- Ive Always been someone who would Hold onto even The tiniest of grudges , but Just . Silent . Constantly Hurried to Work and Perform and Please . Hence the center point Of the canvas , Inspired By my Old Therapist's words how 'I would rather Bleed out before knocking on someone's door to ask for help'
This work Is Mostly tongue in cheek about me As a person . IThink For Anyone That kind of recognizes me IThink it feels Pretty Well representative of How Eccentric it is . How Nonsensical . And IFind it Comforting
TheresNot that many references Sprinkled in Honestly . IWont overexplain some either Cause It Takes away from the work . IThink IWould just mention that While IWas Making the note IWas Thinking of my Trip to Berlin with Hagati . "Train terminates here" Is a PRetty common Expression , And Terminates can Obviously mean many Things . IJust think the word sounds Really funny when Used in relation to Trains as a Non-Native . I replaced it With Exterminated Anyway since it felt more straightforward .
Also IReally wnated to add in the LED Shoes (THATHAVE BEEN CUT OFF BY THE CANVAS...!!!) cause IReally wanted them When IWas Younger And Thought they were such a staple of 2015/2017 Polish Culture . IStill know how to Shuffle dance
The Pink Balloon Was meant To be a Loose interpretation of a Sun . Flaccid Cause the fabric stripes Wouldnt stay up . IKept the Reference to Hagati Because they are My Family and Everything I Do is Out of love for them . Pink Sun , Blue Star, Green Moon
Thats All . Unless IRemember to Mention Something Else IHad in mind